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Monday, 19 March 2012

you're not listening to me when you .....

- give me advice

- tell me why i shouldn't feel that way

- feel you need to do something to solve my problems

- can't accept i feel what i feel no matter how irrational

- cause me to focus on convincing you rather than understanding my own issues

- don't see things from my point of view

- are not acknowledging or responding to me or my body language, feelings, meanings, silences

- are judging me, correcting me, sorting me out

- have a focus - its just not on me

- are in a hurry

- ask so many questions it feels like an interrogation

- are doing something else whilst you listen to me

- tell your own story

- jump in to reassure me

- keep on interrupting me 

summarised from materials found here from 2010 conference and in particular the handouts for the April 16 breakout session on listening in a world of talk by linda murchinson & mary zahl

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